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Las Crónicas de Armando: Capítulo Tres

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Some birds aren't meant to be caged.

Anne-Marie Sorvin-USA TODAY Sports

Once a Metro focuses so heavily on "current, actual" players for Red Bull New York that occasionally we think it's worth our time, your time, and quite likely your employer's time to take a few moments and study the former players. The former players who have left us but who still nonetheless stir our souls. Specifically, former players on personal journeys through all of life's facets, from social media to New York and -- well, actually, only social media and only in New York.

That player is Armando. This glorious former Red Bulls defender chronicles his daily New York life through Instagram posts, just as our forefathers chronicled their lives and history with literature and art -- the literature and art which likely got trashed when an ungrateful grandchild wanted more space in the attic to store their Sega Dreamcast.

So, let's appreciate the historical Instagrams we have been given today. Follow us as we enter...Armando's world, part three.

Armando Decorates Bilingually

My new picture.

A photo posted by Armando Lozano (@armandolozano16) on

It's important when you're decorating your apartment to make sure both the English-speaking and Spanish-speaking are able to read the inspirational corporate slogans you've attached to your wall. Which you've placed ... right next to...a dangling electrified wire.

Here's hoping "Best Yet to Come" portends the arrival of a better electrician than the last one, my friend!

Armando's Lighter Side

Caption: "Días muy duros con mi personal trainer. Me ves reír pero no sabes lo que he sufrido."

Translation: "Tough days with my personal trainer. You see me laugh but do not know what I have suffered."

You can't keep this man down! Even as bubbling rage from the maltreatment at the hands of his gym trainer simmers deep inside him, Armando takes time to pose in an '80s-sitcom-style final credits freeze frame with his presumed torturer. Pain, agony, possible Stockholm syndrome -- sometimes ya just gotta laugh!

Armando Takes Everything in Stride

Nada es fácil,siempre hay obstáculos que debemos saltar.

A photo posted by Armando Lozano (@armandolozano16) on

Caption: "Nada es fácil, siempre hay obstáculos que debemos saltar."

Translation: "Nothing is easy, there are always obstacles that we must jump."

Wise words. True, in this particular photo, the obstacle Armando seems to be jumping over is a urine puddle against a brick wall, but it's a lesson for us all:  You, too, can embrace the lackluster hygiene of New York City with gusto!

What will Armando share with us next? More photos? More life lessons? Yep, probably! Join us next time when we explore yet again the fashion-forward world our favorite former Red Bull inhabits!