Since the Daily Mail reported that Red Bull is stalking England in search of a football club to add to its global soccer family, there have been two simultaneous approaches to forcing the rumor into retreat.
Sky Sports took the most direct route: a straightforward rebuttal. Unfortunately, Sky's rumor-killing story was as thinly-sourced as the Mail's original rumor, so it was not perhaps as effective as it hoped to be.
Hence the need for the second approach: the football clubs of England will painstakingly eliminate themselves, one by one.
In this effort, curiously, the Mail has also been complicit: taking a moment to report that Papa Red Bull had ruled out Leeds United. Red Bull has ruled itself out of any interest in Leeds more than once. But the Mail is undeterred, breaking the news that Papa was scared off the hunt for Leeds United because it was feared the club might be too successful.
Well, the Mail didn't phrase it that way:
Energy drink giant Red Bull, who Sports Agenda revealed this week are keen to buy an English club, have looked at Nottingham Forest and Leeds, whose executives were invited to tour their flagship outfit RB Leipzig.
But Red Bull, who ideally would like to own a London team, felt there might be a conflict if Leeds qualify again for European football.
Huh. OK. So what you're suggesting is Red Bull wants an English football club that isn't likely to qualify for European competitions?
This doesn't quite seem to fit the Red Bull soccer profile: Papa currently has RB Leipzig doing impressive things in Bundesliga; Salzburg is expected to challenge for the Austrian league title every season; the New York Red Bulls have similar ambitions. Only RB Brasil seems to be limited to the role of feeder club.
Still, per the Mail, Papa Red Bull wants a London club that isn't likely to qualify for UEFA tournaments.
RB Dulwich Hamlet, perhaps?