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In a new feature at OaM, our podcast correspondent Ross Haley will periodically give us a brief taste of some of the spiciest conversations happening in the vast landscape of New York Red Bulls fan podcasts.
This week, an excerpt from a recent episode of one of the buzziest new pods on the Metro scene, Irritable Bull Syndrome. Check in as Joey and Terry discuss RBNY’s surprising decision to hire a new stadium public address announcer:
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JOEY B: Fans are certainly divided on the new guy.
TERRY S: Yes, they are.
JB: They should have picked someone more likable. Do you know who everyone likes? The lead singer of the B-52s. What if he was the Red Bulls’ announcer?
TS: The B-52s?
JB: You know, “Love Shack”, “Rock Lobster”, some other songs nobody cares about.
TS: Ah, yes.
JB: Imagine him introducing the players. We’ve got a defender who’s as big as a WHALE and no he can’t FAIL! And it’s Aaron Long playing at center baaaaaack. You know, like that, except better.
TS: Right.
[Awkward silence.]
TS: (continues) Isn’t he dead?
JB: Is he? Right, so we’ll put a pin in that and circle back later. When they eventually revive a frozen Walt Disney with whatever surgery that takes, we can also bring back the lead singer of the B-52s and he can announce the Red Bulls matches. Walt can buy the team and we can be the New York Mickey Mouses to mock Eurosnobs in some of that ironic humor that’s so popular with the kids these days.
TS: I see.
JB: We can also bring back Genghis Khan so he can breed a new generation of Red Bulls fans.
TS: I’m not comfortable with this discussion.
CS: It’ll be perfect. We’re going to save the Red Bulls with the lead singer of the B-52s, Walt Disney, and Genghis Khan. It’ll be perfect.
The lead singer of the B-52s, Fred Schneider, is alive… and also a native of Newark, New Jersey. Hope to see you at a match, Fred!
Walt Disney and Genghis Khan are still dead.
There were no further episodes of Irritable Bull Syndrome.
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